Sunday, September 28, 2008

Waiting for Dax

I had a very interesting morning. I videotaped a beautiful pregnant woman, Stephana. She is a friend of Andrea's who is on her way to having a home birth any day now, I suspect as early as tonight, she was already having contractions while I was there. Her first child was also born at home. Andrea will be photographing the home birth of their second son, Dax and I will have the absolute privelege of being present to videotape it. She is very passionate about natural child birth and the ability of every woman to bear a child naturally if she wishes. She wants to empower women to take charge of their own bodies and balance the culture of fear associated with birth today by documenting her own natural journey. Her inspiration comes from a beautiful video she shared with me when I got there. It was the documentation of an amazing and beautiful home birth of a midwife from Mexico. It was powerful and moving in its simplicity and naturalness.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

going strong

Its day 5 and I'm still going strong..I'm excited. Today I jogged for 25 minutes! It wasn't that bad at all..I think the key is going every single day.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

The element

"Is the place where passion and skill meet. People find the element when they engage in the thing that they love that they are especially good at doing." Ken Robinson

Is it okay to be 34 and not yet know what you are especially good at?

I woke up at 6 this morning and instead of trying to go back to sleep I got out of bed, put on some walking clothes and started walking. It was as simple as that. I usually make lists of things I need before I can embark upon a 'fitness program' blah blah blah, I'm an expert at stalling..anyway decided to walk out of suburbia to the main road, very exciting. There and back was 45 minutes at a brisk pace. I just HAVE to make this a part of my life. All the people I admire have been regular exercisers all their lives. It just HAS to be one more thing like brushing my teeth or sleeping at night. My body needs this. I'm too young to be having aches in my knees, shoulders and back. Ridiculous. Anyway here's my commitment in print..I will do this for 30 days. Wake up early and go for a walk of at least 45 minutes.

I came back home and talked to my mother on the phone. I asked her what she thought my talents or strengths were growing up. She said confidence. I loved to be up on stage in front of people and entertain them, I loved to tell stories. " You were very confident and fearless and also dayavan(compassionate)." Should I be a theater actor, a preacher or a God father?

In other news, I did buy myself the implements to get started on my dream board, I just need to get them out of the dickey/trunk of the car.

Interesting piece for habit change.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

los pinguinos mambo

Loved Ms. t's macho penguins and wanted to add what Anika and i boogied to all afternoon=)

Monday, September 15, 2008

listen in

For the past week my inner voice repeated the word, 'unfulfilled' in my head. It didn't feel very good. What is missing? Thought, desire, dreams. Caught up in the everydayness of life makes me forget to think of the big picture of my life. Why do I feel unfulfilled? The first question I need to answer is 'What do I want?' By not defining my dreams, I perpetuate my state of vague disillusionment/disenchantment. I feel stuck in negative feelings without the time/energy to really examine what I need to make me feel fulfilled.

The truth is, its easier to be stuck in negativity than do the real work of trying to fix what feels broken. This morning I was feeling anxious, there was a sick feeling in my stomach like before a race. I was suddenly having flashes of what I want from my life, of what I could be if I would just get out of my own way and follow my dreams. Thoughts I have put on the back burner were coming back in an overwhelming flood. D heard me sighing and fretting and looked me straight in the eyes and said, " Don't be afraid of it, let it grow within you."

This is where I plan to start. Thanks Sara.